The First Week of Study Abroad is Tough
When I first moved to Mannheim, Germany, it was the last days of August when the thickness of summer heat was still lingering. I was with my dad, a man who is gently caring until a mistake is made. My first mistake happened on the flight itself, I had not arranged to pick up my keys from my student accommodation house master. This meant that I could not move into my room until the next day, and my dad would have to get a room at the hotel he was staying at for me as well. My second mistake was at said hotel, I had forgotten my phone charger.
‘Move in day’ was finally here, 24 hours delayed, and tensions were high. I was embarrassingly grumpy; I hated the city. I hated the way it smelt, the way the streets were laid out, the confusing transport system, but most importantly I hated the fact that after my dad would fly home, I would be alone.
I cried in the restaurant confused as to why my father would leave his only daughter in a scary city by herself, he said that I was brave, and he was proud of me (at that moment I felt everything but brave). He helped me buy some bits and bobs for my new room, and with that he was gone. I cried some more. I began to meet my new flatmates. I first met Kate, from Ireland and we would go on to be good friends, then I met a Swede boy, a Portuguese girl, and two English boys. My accommodation was around 30 minutes out of the city and the flat was not the dream group of close-knit friends that I had, unreasonably, thought it would be. I cried some more.
I phoned my friend, who last year moved to Australia to live there by herself for 9 months. She was my omniscient living abroad guru. She told me to walk, just walk and notice the things around you, and soon you will see things that you love and then the good part will happen. Holding me in suspense I asked pleadingly what the good part is, she said you will soon start to understand that you are doing it, that you are actually living in Germany all by yourself, and the world did not end when my dad flew home instead it had just begun. My friend was right of course, I walked and walked. I found a book shop that had a section of English books, I found a record shop with hundreds of CDs for my car. But, most importantly, the good part happened. I began to feel such an overwhelming sense of freedom just by walking around, because I finally realised that I was brave and I had achieved what I worked hard to get, and now I had a whole country to explore, people to meet, a language to learn and how exciting that was.
A week into living in Germany, I realised two key things. The first being that German people love to stare intensely at you on public transport, there will be nothing on your face or something wrong with your clothes, they are just simply staring (I am still not sure why). This was particularly confusing for me as I come from London where you would think acknowledging the presence of other people in public is illegal. The second lesson learnt was how quiet everything is when you do not speak the language everyone around you is. Previously, cafes had been loud spaces where I would, sometimes accidentally other times on purpose, listen to the person next to me tell their full life story in much too specific detail and slightly too loudly for a public space, now despite there still being all the chatter, it was silent. Getting the packed tram into town has become almost a moment of meditation, I was suddenly detached from all the life happening around me. I loved it.
Studying abroad is the weirdest because while it feels like the scariest thing, it is also the best time of your life all in one go. It is such an achievement and takes a lot of courage, but the reward of making new friends, living in a different country, all of it, is unmatched. On top of that it all goes too fast… By the time I was booking my final flight back to England I felt like Germany was my home. It was as though I was getting broken up with, but by an entire city. Yes, leaving was just as hard as arriving but the silver lining was, I had all these amazing friends from all parts of the world so there was so much more to explore.
Words by Sorcha Mcfall